nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Randomize
