I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
