Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
i think my cat just said my name.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
