apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
