Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize