your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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