Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize
