Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.

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  (516): i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese. http://tfl.nu/t7g1
  Replies (22) Good night (2943) Bad night (828)
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  (626): View more from California

  it was like eating out sand paper

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  (626): it was like eating out sand paper http://tfl.nu/u8qd
  Replies (32) Good night (623) Bad night (7836)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one

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  (740): i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one http://tfl.nu/4erg
  Replies (19) Good night (3814) Bad night (1087)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.

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  (502): so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked. http://tfl.nu/56pg
  Replies (15) Good night (663) Bad night (4519)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?

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  (412): Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs? http://tfl.nu/bbo7
  Replies (28) Good night (5072) Bad night (1754)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.

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  (315): Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise. http://tfl.nu/jq04
  Replies (8) Good night (4501) Bad night (1481)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights

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  (812): woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights http://tfl.nu/5oxk
  Replies (16) Good night (1157) Bad night (2800)
• Favorite

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.

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  (662): We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower. http://tfl.nu/o5pz
  Replies (10) Good night (2229) Bad night (860)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.

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  (914): Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/4mfa
  Replies (5) Good night (1759) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.

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  (731): You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely. http://tfl.nu/nb0c
  Replies (9) Good night (597) Bad night (1403)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.

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  (306): Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians. http://tfl.nu/ykxr
  Replies (8) Good night (1241) Bad night (534)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.

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  (989): I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus. http://tfl.nu/jo2t
  Replies (2) Good night (813) Bad night (302)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.

  (1-859): View more from Kentucky

  ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...

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  (859): you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection. (1-859): ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave... http://tfl.nu/0oli
  Replies (3) Good night (800) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  So it may have been laced, sue me.

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  (561): He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming. (770): So it may have been laced, sue me. http://tfl.nu/joyn
  Replies (1) Good night (612) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid

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  (315): Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid http://tfl.nu/u5v9
  Replies (5) Good night (203) Bad night (847)

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