yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
not ubering you a puppy
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize