so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
