Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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