Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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