I wanna passion pit in your ass
what day is it and did you see me today?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
