Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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