fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
