**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize