My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
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