kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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