We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
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The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
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I just had sex on a roof
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...