I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
