oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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