She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
