her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize