I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
