Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
