Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
This show inspires me to have sex in space
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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