the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
