Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
