dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
its not stalking. its research.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
third nipple confirmed
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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