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He asked me if I "almost moaned"
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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