So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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