dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
