Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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