STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
