bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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