I smell stomach acid.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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