Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
