I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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