I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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