I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
