i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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