She said her name was "party"
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
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So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
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I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
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