Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
