jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
