Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
