do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize