We're facebook friends in real life
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize