glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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