she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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