is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
